Directions in Life

"不是你可以不可以做，而是你要不要做。"

There are some quotes that will always be lingering in your mind. The above one was a quote that was told to me in Secondary Three.

There are quotes that you just bump into and pass by. There are some where you embrace them.

What's with the sudden thing about quotes, you ask?

Well, I'm not too sure as well. It's currently 11:12 AM, and I have lots of things to do: marking promotion exercise papers, Turquoised! shop clean-up, cleaning of the study table, cleaning of the luggage bag, finishing the next chapters of my fiction, training camp...

Have you ever felt like that before? You know you have lots of things to do, but you have zero motivation to do anything. I was supposed to finish marking yesterday, and I procrastinated because I was finishing Descendants of The Sun. There wasn't any motivation anymore. This was how I felt when I was studying for Math 'A' Levels, and see how that turned out? (C, heh.)

Furthermore, my email isn't giving me the notifications of the emails I wish to receive. Every other day, I receive: UI Inspiration Board #xx, Training Program, xxx University having a Talk... Yet, I don't get any notifications saying I've gotten into an university. Yada, people have been saying my scores definitely can get into a school, or even better, get into the course I want. However, nothing is etched in stone, yet. It's scary when your friends have received their emails and you are left there, not having received anything. I highly doubt the universities will send you an email to tell you that you are not chosen as well... (Actually, I think they do but I really don't want to receive that.)

I guess it's normal to always regret joining St.John, huh? Actually, I used to think like that, perhaps, a few years ago. However, now? Not really. Don't even know why this popped up. Heh.

Lastly, I'm finally going for a job interview next Monday. I mean, someone finally called me back. Felt so unwanted, lulul. The pay like shiat, though. Guess when you have no experience you always start from that pay. Honestly, I wanna earn more, and I think I can. If I chose to work for the hotel job or that office job, I'll probably get $8/hr or even more. Why am I going the hard way and choosing to work in a cafe/pub, then?

I wonder why.

Guess I am a sadist. (・・；)